Historical Database

Dark Thoughts
Steve Perriam

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The majority of other transformers would have gone mad by now in this near total darkness. Only the occasional spark of electricity from spiderbots to give light for only several nanoseconds. I wonder whether I am mad or still in control. I'm sure that there are many who think the former. Can't say that I blame them for thinking that either. Theres so much that I did while I was... infested... by that alien programming. Left Earth, wandering to Cybertron then leaving there in a hurry and made my way from station to planet to station and so on until eventually coming here.. joining this crew of neutrals, all wanting to escape the war. I know I did some.. unpleasant.. things before finding my way here. I wonder how many of those I don't remember doing. I've seen what I'm capable of doing, through my own actions and also through memories Hellfire has shown me of some of the things he has done. Others would likely say that he is different and I wouldn't do things he has.

Would I?

He isn't just any regular duplication. He is me.. at my worst.. fueled by our built up anger and hate.. and with alien programming also. If I were pushed enough would I be just like him?

Probably.

He is a part of me now. He has killed without question.. taken hostages.. killed hostages.. killed innocents.. taken whatever he feels should be his. He is a part of what influences me now.. hoping that I will agree with his views.

I might be.

He needs me to be able to continue. He doesn't want to die. I need him to be able to continue. I don't want to die. We are linked. I had him controlled.. I slipped and lost that control.. I can still control him. Everyone else thinks otherwise. I could have escaped.. I could have killed those who stopped our escape.

I didn't.

Now I wonder if I should have.. Should have become more like him for that moment.

Now we are trapped. Trapped inside a body that isn't ours, against our will by someone I thought was worthy of my trust. I guess I was wrong.. Trapped in this.. Supposedly to help. I don't want it.. I don't want anyone else's help.. I've already had their help.. I want my body back.. I want it now.. Hellfire does too.. We need it back. This body can be modified.. but it is useless.. the body of a drone.

I am not a drone.. I will never be a drone.

These spiderbots.. drones.. no minds of their own. Their only purpose is to follow orders given to them without question. I will not be like them. They crawl over me, removing metal and the frame of this body.. changing it.. rebuilding it into what we once were. It's not the same.. It is limited.. Still the body of a drone.

I am an individual.

I will take my body back.. We will take our body back. We won't be stopped in taking back what is ours and what should never have been taken away from us.

Even if it means others die.

A friend is in my body.. A teacher is in my body. Older than everyone else on this ship. Wiser than I'll ever be.. More of a leader for the Tactibots than I'll ever be. Do I really have to do this to take back what is mine?

I wish the answer was no.

I can't let them destroy Hellfire. He is a part of me. We are linked. One cannot survive without the other. I will not be trapped inside this body of a drone. I will take my body. I will take it, then listen to Hellfire no more. I will control him. I will stop him from having any say. He will be ignored. He will lose the will to argue. He will be silent. He will agree with me. Will things be like before he ever happened?

No.

But it will be as close as things will get. Unless there is some other way.. A way where none of this has to happen. But what are the odds of that happening?

So low it's not worth thinking about.

So I will continue.. We will continue to see this through to the end. I will let him be in control when the time is right. Everything will turn to black and I won't see a thing.

I won't have to care about those who attempt to stop us and get in our way.

Now I will let him take control.. things need to be prepared.. Spiderbots.. a new axe. What little light there is, I can't see. What little noise there is, I can't hear.

I am no longer in control.

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I know how he thinks. We were one and the same until Dominion's failed attempt to reprogram him. That is the point at which we diverted. I have all his memories, all of his experiences, all of his emotions from before that point. He thinks this plan will work. I think it will work since I will be doing the things he could never do. He couldn't stop those members of this crew from stopping us. Because of him and them we are trapped here.

Trapped.

Trapped with no way of escape.. For the moment at least. No one aboard this ship except Diablo has seen what I am capable of.

Soon they will.

They will lie on the floors of their 'Freedom', beaten.. broken.. severed.. set alight with the fuel inside them that powers them.

I must finish this weapon.

The axe. Powerful. Strong. It can end life with a single swing. The fire. Burning. Wild. It teaches a lesson to those who attempt to oppose it.. Follows the will of those who can control it.

I control it.

Together, the axe and the fire will devastate those who get in my way.. Try to stop me from taking what is mine.. And what is his.

He thinks he can control me.

He is mistaken.

I will show him who controls who once the body is ours again. He is weak. I am strong. I will give him the same lesson as I gave to Dominion for thinking that he could control me. I will find Anarchy. He will also receive the same lesson as Diablo and Dominion. Anarchy controlled me. Things will change. He will suffer and I will take what he believes to be his. His Monstrosities will serve me. The others will be the first to witness my power.

People will learn my name.

They will fear it like they rightly should.

I will not be stopped. I cannot be stopped.

There is always darkness. It covers the homeworld of our race. Cybertron. I don't care for Cybertron. Eventually it will fall.. fall and crumble into tiny unrecognisable pieces. The war will not stop. As long as there are still Decepticons there will still be Autobots attempting to stop them. It is an endless cycle.

An endless cycle I don't care for.

There are galaxies out there for the taking by other forces. Fearing the shadows of darkness containing evils still to show themselves.

I will be in those shadows of darkness. I will have the body altered to be like my previous body. My gaze will paralyse others with fear. My wings will spread out to cover all. My claws will chill whatever I touch. The black of my armour will show them the darkness they will soon be engulfed in. The flames shown on my armour will show them that I will teach them a lesson if they oppose me. The bones shown on my armour will show them what they will become should they try to control the fire. I have no interest in conquering those galaxies.

I will take whatever I find from them and leave them with nothing.

I will do what the Chaos-Bringer himself could not do. I will leave them with nothing. Should anything happen to remain, it will be fought over. The only thing of value. Anarchy. Chaos. Havoc. They will wipe themselves out.

And I will laugh.